Writing a song to my baby, because my friend did too.

My girlfriend made up a song for her little girl, regardless of how silly it sounds or how off key she may be. (But I know you aren't Liz! :)

So, when Brooke has been upset, or just won't go down and I don't know what to say to her, I can sing a simple song, that goes to a tune something like Jesus Loves Me.


B is for my baby,
R I really love you.
O you are outstanding,
O you're only ours.
K we knew you'd come to us,
L for all the love you bring,
Y because you are here
N for now and always.
Brooklyn,
Brooklyn,
Brooklyn Victoria C_________________.

And today, that was all she needed to close those baby blues and take a nap so this Momma can (watch biggest loser) clean the kitchen and paint.

Three Stories

I read in some parenting book given to me by a wonderful coworker (ex, I suppose :( ) that it is important to have a nightly routine for baby.

I read this months ago, and they said to begin this around month 2, so we did. However, this other book tells us to start at 3.5 to 4 months old, and now I see why the other book told us to start sooner. It isn't for the baby as much as it is for the parents to be in routine, it is hard to learn a new routine when you're so used to another. When this comes to parenting, it is so easy with a new baby to be quite laissez faire and go about your life... until she is 3.5 months old, then baby needs something predictable for bedtime. We all like it. Everyone has a routine, ours was usually TV, shower, jammies, bed, snuggle, kiss, night.

Anyway, we have had a routine for at least a month now with Brooke, (crazy!!) of feeding, bath, diaper, clothes, snuggles, bed.

After reading this newer book, they suggested story time. I know Brooke has no clue what I am saying, but the repetition of a story is supposed to help calm her down and let her know it is time to sleep.

Well, tonight, we did bath, diaper, jammies, feeding, stories, kisses from daddy, bed. And she was out like a light, that was about 30 minutes ago. After a 10 hour stretch of sleep last night, I'm pretty much 100% positive she'll be up within the hour, and that is A-OK with me.

But I was thinking about these stories that I am reading to Brooke every night. They aren't Jesus, Bible thumping stories (although we received many that we love), but just books about how much we love our girl.

My favorite lines are a sweet ending to a full week and a beautiful beginning to a new one.

"Everything about you is especially fine, I love what you are, I love what you do, Oooo, I love you." -Snuggle Puppy

"I love all that you will be and everything you are." -How do I love you?

"You know, you really wear me out. But I love you anyway." -Olivia

Selfish Momma

I'm learning that when I get frustrated with my child, it is not always because I don't know what to do, but more so, because I am a selfish person who would rather not be dealing with a crying baby.

That's not easy to say.

When I became a real mom (we said I was a mom from the moment we knew I was pregnant, okay, that's a lie, we called ourselves parents with our dog, because she is our baby, think what you want, we love her.) my best friend K and I talked about how much we feel like we have given up happily for our girls. Fewer showers, less time on the computer/phone, no shopping trips just for fun, less sleep. And yes, our bodies, although mine is looking quite better (clothed) than before I had Brooklyn. (Unfortunately a c-section gave me a forever flap of belly fat, gross, but hey, I still feel sexy. It's all in the head.) Anyway, yes, moms are probably the most selfless people I know. I recall many times my mom has been selfless, and there are too many to count. It is just what moms (and dads) do for their kids.

But some days I am tired of it, and I am really selfish. I will whisper, "Go to sleep baby," in the most loving tone I can muster. (Yes, I know I'm not the only one here, amen.) All because I want to sit on the computer and NOT work. Or I want to take a long shower, or put on makeup.

I'm not sure that will ever go away, and that is okay, because I promise to give myself grace here. I have committed to still take care of myself- it would be crazy not to. And yes, for me, mascara is a necessity, I feel like a nasty looking weirdo without it, and you can't feel like that and be the best momma you can be. But, I know that Brooke will nap every day, so I need to just relax and let her nap when she is ready (drowsy but not yet asleep, blah blah blah) and not get frustrated because I want her to nap now.

So, there is my confession, I still, and always will be selfish, but I'll work on it, and let you know how that goes.... if I remember.

Ps- Brooke just woke up as I finished typing this, "Of course you'd only take an hour nap," I said it my head, and made sure to hold her extra tight and kiss her when I picked her up, "but I'm happy you are here, and blessed that you are mine."

One of those nights.

Last night was one of those nights where I really thought Brooke would be an only child. Then I woke up to little smacks on my chest, and a big smile on my baby's face and figured eh, we can have 10 more, bring it on! Well... I can't have 10 more, stupid c-section and pocketbook. But we're open :)

It was a night where she fell right asleep. Bliss. I went .7 miles away to look at a house with my brother, best friend (who will be my sister in law), and mother. Come on, I HAD to go, my brother actually called me close to a million times yesterday. I can't even remember the last time he called me. The fact that he invited me to look at this house was a huge step. He likes me again, and that makes me get emotional. Man, we used to be best friends. We'd talk for hours, shop together, nap together, watch tv and movies together, talk guys/girls together. Then I dated/married one of his best friends... now he is planning to do the same to me, and he is finally talking to me again. Anyway, it was great to see this house, and know that my girl was asleep.

I think she smelled me or something, because within 10 minutes of getting home she was awake. She probably thought it was a nap or something.

It was one of those nights where you give her back the paci and she sleeps for 10 minutes, so you just let her get up because you're close to positive she thought it was a nap.

One of those nights when she is smiling so much, she can't be tired. She is cooing, talking and squealing. (And, her eyes are not red, which is the sure sign of exhaustion.)

She starts to yawn so you lay her down, mass hysteria. You pick her up, do a little bouncing, kisses, "shhh shhhhhhhh" es. Lay her down, she buys it.

Then she fusses, you play hot dog on the grill. You know the game, tummy, side, back, side, tummy, back. "Child, GO to sleep!" you whisper.

You walk out of the room, victory, for 25 seconds.

Your husband takes over, because you've played hot dog on the grill for close to 45 minutes and are quite bleary eyed.

He plays bounce, set, bounce set to no avail. He is covered in spit up, she is covered, it is disgusting.

She talks, gurgles, coos.

So finally, we all give. FINE child, it is bedtime for the whole family, apparently. We lay her down, and she will not stop talking.

What is wrong? Tears stream down my face because I am her mom, and I don't know what is wrong.

I feed her.

Screams.

I bounce her.

Screams.

One of those nights, but I KNOW something is wrong, because this kid does not cry unless something is wrong. So, we give her Tylenol. She doesn't have a fever, but something is wrong, and we are out of ideas.

Finally daddy gets the lotion, I strip her down and start rubbing her belly in clockwise circles, screaming gets louder and finally, giggles.

Massive farts her Papa would be proud of and some poops.

We change her pants, put her back in bed and blood curdling screams, I rub her belly again... shocking, more poops. So, we change her... again.

So, not only has it been a hot dog, bouncy down, clean pants/dirty kind of a night, but honestly, I can't keep my eyes open anymore and it is only 10:30. Pathetic I say.

She finally went down in her own bed and all was calm. Right as I fell asleep she fussed.

Daddy gets the "it's not worth it" face and baby is in bed with Mom and Dad.

We're still not sure what it was last night, but we all got a good night's sleep thank God.

And she went down like a champ for her nap today... after talking to herself for 30 minutes.

It kind of feels like a victory, even though I am checking her every 10 minutes since she is belly sleeping.

Oh those nights, you make mommying pretty difficult, but goodness are those smiles and giggles so worth it. Thank you for the happiest baby around, smiling even through her gas pains. Man, I am beyond blessed to share in those nights.

I'll screw up my kids.

Congratulations B-lyn, you have officially worn out your mother to the point of sheer exhaustion. (Last night I didn't know which direction was up it seemed) Now, be a good little girl and sleep for more than 3 hours.

Ahhh, I'm that mom who totally lets her baby sleep in bed with her because she wants to be well rested. And that is okay with me, and her daddy.

I'm also that mom who loves hearing what other people do for their kids... when they don't tell me what to do with my own.

Oops, was that too forward? I love you people, really I do! But we all think we know what we're doing here... and quite frankly, none of us do. So let's just share our experiences and move on with it. None of your screwed up your kids too much, so I won't ruin mine. Jeanny told me a long time ago it is not about not screwing up your kids, because every one does, but it is about screwing them up as little as possible. Forgive me if thinking sleeping with your parents sometimes (at 3 months old) is not damaging.

Maybe Brooke will sleep with us until she is 16 like our friend Jake did.. hehe, just kidding, or maybe 14 like her mom, but really, I'm a normal person, so does it matter that much? Trust me, Jon and I will find time to be together, trust me.

Let's see, what other horrible things do we do?

Well, Brooklyn gets a paci right off the floor- and she is our first born!

She even sucks on my fingers when I can't find the paci. Or grandma's knuckles, or shoulder, or biceps, or whatever.

Brooke peed in her bed where I change her last week and I didn't change the sheets yet because I can barely get the mattress out of the crib let alone get the ridiculous mattress pad cover thingie on- seriously baby product makers of the world, you SAY I can wash and tumble dry low, you lie. So, I just change her on a sheet cover instead. Oh, and I let her lay naked on a pile of quilts this weekend to air out her tiny diaper rash, and she peed on the blankets. Yup, peed.

Ps- tonight, daddy let her lay on the same blanket, which, you guessed it, wasn't washed this weekend, but it is on the docket for tomorrow morning! Don't call DCFS on me, she laid on the other half of the blanket.

Brooke slept on her tummy this week, and she slept for 12 whole hours, WHOLE.

Then she didn't, and that was great. Insert sarcasm.

I've always thought of children as an alarm clock, Jon and I cared for Lexie, Hunter and Callie two years ago for a weekend, they woke us up bright and early. Well... Brooke does this, then falls back asleep, glory hallelujah child, God MADE you for this family! So, this morning when I fed her at 7:15 I figured we'd get another hour or 2 out of her and off to church we'd go... until we all woke up at 10:20- thank you baby girl for the sleep! You can NOT be my alarm clock any day!

And as for vacuuming, if you read my blog normally, I used it in the living room the other day. So don't worry. :) And I swiffer a few times a week, so my house really is clean, and I wash the shower, and the toilet, and the sinks, and the kitchen counters... just I hate vacuuming when the baby sleeps, and changing sheets is my worst nightmare.

Miss Little Homemaker

This week I decided to be super wife and super mom, naturally.

The house is clean.

The toilet has been scrubbed.

The laundry is done.

The diapers are done being prepped.

And- I have cooked two REAL meals. Since Brooke was born, I have cooked:

1- ranch breaded chicken cubes
2- macaroni and hot dogs
3- tacos
4- taco salad

So... this week I set out on a little journey to cook the way that I love to. Truly both meals were so great that I have to tell you what I made!

Chicken Quesadillas

1 T. chili powder
2 T. fresh chopped cilantro
1 T. olive oil
1 lime
1 tsp. salt
1 tsp. cumin
1 1/2 packages shredded Mexican cheese
1/2 onion diced
1/2 tomato diced
1 chicken breast

1. Mix chili powder, cilantro, olive oil, lime, salt and cumin.
2. Slice chicken breast
3. Cover chicken in mixture.
4. Cook chicken in skillet until there is no pink left inside.
5. Remove chicken from pan and shred when cool enough to touch.
6. In the same skillet, saute onions until golden brown.
7. Heat clean pan (I use cast iron) and place in a tortilla.
8. Layer- cheese, chicken, onion, tomato, cheese. Cover with another tortilla. Warm until cheese is melted.
9. Remove from pan and slice with pizza cutter.

Serve with rice, sour cream and salsa.

AND...

Lemon garlic chicken (I seriously said, "This tastes like wedding food!" and I have been to some GOOD weddings!)

3 T. olive oil
zest of one lemon
3 cloves of garlic (Friends, this means 3 of the little lumps that make up ONE giant lumpy piece or garlic, NOT three big whole things, you might die if you use that much, just saying)
1 T. fresh parsley (I used curly parsley)
1 tsp. salt
1/2 tsp. pepper
1 chicken breast

1. Marinate chicken for a little while. (While my chicken was cooking for the quesadillas I made the marinade for this meal and let it sit overnight.)
2. Slice and dice chicken breast.
2. I cooked in the oven at 350 degrees for about 20-30 minutes. (sprinkled the rest of the marinade over the meat)

Served with mashed potatoes, hello!

Jon and I share a chicken breast every night, so it is always sliced or cut up before I cook it. Reasons why I do this?
1- cheaper
2- less meat, we really don't need HUGE portions of meat with every meal (unless it is teriyaki beef)
3- cooks way faster, making it cheaper to cook too!

So, this Suzy Homemaker is pooped this week, but her husband has a full belly, and a little garlic breath, but that's okay.

I'm working on making 3 great meals a week, tonight we're aiming for Crispy Citrus Chicken Teriyaki, I'll let you know how it goes.

My Three Month Old

Brooklyn,

You are three months old today, and the load you landed in your pants made me proud. I suppose I should not say that it was in your pants per se... seeing as most of it ended up on your bouncy seat... As disgusting as THAT was, it may gross you (and readers) out that you absolutely love it when the dog licks your face... and in your mouth. What can I say? No sibling rivalry in this house! (But please, learn to kiss with your mouth closed quickly.)

The amount of "things" you've learned this month amaze me.

You can suck your thumb now, but do a pretty bad job, not gonna lie. You just can't get any suction on that skinny stick of a finger, and I am grateful for this.

You rolled over on 9/8/10 in bed about five times and then on 9/9/10 you rolled over on the living room floor unassisted, and scared yourself pretty badly! :) What a cutie! I now put 2 quilts down so when you try again another day, your head won't thump so loudly.

You giggle like no other, the cutest belly laugh. You laugh AT daddy and I, and you are thrilled at our belly farts, tickles, peek a boo, and smiles.

You still love being naked and squeal with delight at bath time.

You are so proud as you stand on our laps.

You no longer fit in infant diapers. You make us proud and are growing every day, in the 90th percentile for weight at 14 lbs. 3.4 ounces, the 92nd percentile for height at 24 3/4 inches, and 97th percentile for head measurement... girl, you got brains! :)

You gurgle as you talk to us, this used to be your little pre-cry. Now, it is your words! when you get really excited you squeal out coos that sound like "Hi!" and I swear you cry out "Momma!" late at night. Sometimes you scream so loud I cringe, happy squeals at least!

Right now, you are supposed to be in bed on this birthday evening. However, you are laying on the living room floor with Daddy playing "There she is!" and laughing with your mouth as wide as you can open it. You are gurgling, "Ah geeeee," and screaming. You're getting sleepy, and we'll tuck you in again soon.

How precious to see a daddy and his daughter, even though you SHOULD be in bed.

(B went down perfectly tonight, one paci plug and out. She woke up an hour into sleep like she ALWAYS does, slept for another 30 minutes after I fed her (my book says to try feeding to see if it is a hunger or sleep problem, it was hunger). Then, you woke up... again. And you are so awake, so daddy and I think it was just a nap. So, you'll get to be up again and we'll go to bed around 9:30, you stinker. But, that is what happens when your naps get screwed up by going to the doctor!)

I'm sorry you got a shot on your birthday today, but am so proud of you!

On a side note...

Last night before bed I was thinking about the kind of woman I hope you become, and sweet girl, as I am reflecting on that thought, I pray that you will be like Mary, Lazarus's sister in Bethany. Brooke, I hope that you will be enamored with our Lord and sit at His feet as He teaches you. That you will take time out of your day for Him and not get caught up in the little things. (But you still have to do your chores, just saying.)

Love you little girl.

The Voice of God and my little girl

At night and nap time I whisper "shhhhhhhhhh," into my daughters ear holding her tight to my chest. I "shhhhhhh" as I lay her down, and "shhhhhh" as I walk to the door.

The lights are dim and I hear a sweet suckle on a pink pacifier. Her breaths get quick and short as she searches her crib for my face.

I whisper, "shhhhhhhhhh" and her feet stop kicking. Her hands relax from flailing and she holds tight to her chest. "Brooke, Mama is here," I barely let the words leave my lips.

She knows I am there, although she cannot see me.

This routine reminds me of having faith in my God. I cannot see him, surely I can see the beautiful work of his hands in my daughter's face, the seasons changing, and the life all around me, but I cannot see his face. Brooklyn cannot see my face as I lay her to sleep, but she can hear my voice. And if I am still, if I truly sit and listen, I hear my Heavenly Father calling out to me.

The first time I truly heard God's voice was my junior year in high school. While laying on a freezing gray concrete floor in North Park University between a row of chairs, the speaker at SLAM or SEMP that year I think, told us to be silent. To simply sit and be. To quiet our minds, to stop everything.

I usually count my breaths when nothing is going on, I usually get to 10 then get bored and start tapping my foot or fingers. I think about what I ate for lunch. Where Ashley, Karen, Ben, Andy, Jamie are sitting. How cold that darn floor is. STOP? This was torture.

"Be still, be quiet. Don't think to breath, just lay there and be."

ARE YOU KIDDING ME? There is NOTHING there!

But I trusted, and sat, and waited. Finally I got to the point where I literally heard nothingness. (This is how I trained myself to fall asleep so quickly too, but have since lost that talent with the becoming of a worrying mother and all... or more so thinking mother.)



I'm not sure if it was that day, or another day that we did this exercise again. My memory sucks, p.s. did you notice? But this time, the speaker challenged us to be silent, to still our minds and simply listen to the scripture he read. We were supposed to see what stuck out to us and then repeat that over and over and over until he spoke again. I know that I wrote down what stuck out to me in a journal that is buried in my basement at the moment.

It went something like this: "Psalm 25:4-5

Show me the right path, O Lord, point out the road for me to follow,"

for me to follow, for me to follow, for me to follow on and on and on and on.

Then we did this again, I would have missed the rest of what he said, and I waited to hear what God wanted me to get out of this lesson.

"Show me the right path, O Lord, point out the road for me to follow. Lead me by your truth and teach me, for you are the God who saves me."

God who saves me, God who saves me, God who saves me.

"Show me the right path, O Lord, point out the road for me to follow. Lead me by your truth and teach me, for you are the God who saves me. All day long I put my hope in you."

Hope in you, hope in you, hope in you, hope in you.

Does any of it make sense when put together?

For me to follow, God who saves, hope in you.

Nope, but each moment I clearly heard that what stuck out to me, and that was ALL that I heard, and it was JUST what God wanted me to hear. Just those few words, or even one word. It was like, deep within my soul, a tug that made those words sound different than everything else. So surely, it was some man's voice that said them, but truly God who spoke them.

By faith, I know that was the voice of God.

So when B-lyn goes down to sleep, she has this sense of faith that I am right there, although she cannot hear me. When she grows up, she will hear my voice even when I am not around. "Brooke, be kind. Be gentle. Use nice hands. Look before you cross the street."

Tonight I called out to her and she wrestled in her bed after a few "shhhhhhhhh"es, "Brooklyn, Mama is right here." in a quiet whisper, and she heard me, because she was listening.

God is calling out to each of us, but we are so busy we don't even take the time to listen for it.

Do you?

Floppy Ears

If that dog goes into the bedroom and flops her ears ONE MORE TIME.

I am really excited for the mom's group at Faith to start up, SO excited. I really want to build community with other women, young moms or old moms. I want to be surrounded by women who are supportive and loving. I have the best mom in the world, the best mother in law, and amazing sister in laws. My three best friends make my life wonderful. I just need more, do you know that feeling? You have what IS and looks so great, but you still need more? I don't care if I have five hundred friends or three, but mommying is tricky and sharing it is so much more fun. What a blessing to share it with family, every day, AH, I love it! And am ready to share more!!

I hope that I'm not getting my hopes up, but I'll let them get up because that is who I am. I get really excited about life and I'd be lying if I didn't. I squeal with joy, laugh like a mad man, and clap my hands like there is something wrong with me. I love enjoying life, and I WILL pass that on to my daughter.

I also hope that I will pass on laughter, belly laughs that hurt. That she will laugh with our family and be able to laugh at herself. She did a great job of this this morning in bed with Daddy for their dance party. Seriously, MELT my heart! Jon was made to be this little girl's daddy!

Even though tonight was the roughest bedtime in a long time, I am so happy I got to snuggle my little punk until she was just ready for bed, finally.

So dog, REALLY, shake it all you want out here, but I swear, if you shake it in that bedroom, those floppy precious black ears and double jingler collar, you're sleeping in your cage. (But probably not.)

Ps- Did I say that I ALWAYS wanted a son? Hair bows, flowers, headbands and hats, WHAT was I thinking? Thank you GOD for knowing just what we needed! (Although, I'd take a son in a heart beat!)

You make me look good.

Thank you little girl, thank you for being so good. Especially, thank you for being good in front of our friends, it makes me feel like I'm doing a really good job. :) Not that if you were fussy I would feel that I weren't, but you make me feel so proud. And really, it is okay with me that you have a meltdown in the car after being so happy. And it would be okay if you had a meltdown, I'd be proud to me your mom anyway. I love you- I simply think you are simply amazing. I could not think of a better daughter to have.

Love you cutest punky in the world!

And I'm totally serious, I have this conversation with her, "Thanks for not melting down until we got in the car!" Oh mothering, I love this, and was MADE for this!

Cloth Diaper Stuff

A lot of people ask me a lot about cloth diapers, and yes, still, after 12 weeks I am IN LOVE. We rarely have an explosion from prefolds, HALLELUJAH! And I have explosions from pocket diapers as often as I do in disposables, so I'll take it! :)

This is how I prep my prefold diapers on a budget, for those of you who care.

It is suggested to run diapers through 5-10 HOT washes before use to make the diapers fully absorbent. I do not have the need to fill my ENTIRE washer (ya ya, it doesn't do smaller loads, and that is still too much) with HOT water 10 times, I only have 24 diapers.

When you receive (yes, spell check caught that, I have NEVER been able to spell this stupid word!) your diapers, they will be very flat, almost like a tissue. I unwrap them and blob them all into my sink. I put about 3 inches of the HOTTEST water I can get in there, it is so hot I can barely touch the dipes. Let them soak up the water, wring them out over the ones that did not get wet. Here, I am using as little hot water as possible, just re-using it without having to re-heat. Get it?



After all of the diapers are soaked, I put them into a diaper pail (aka Home Depot bucket, less than $5) and bring them down to the wash. No, I do not wring out the final diapers, that is the washer's job! :)





So, I bring the diapers to the wash and throw them all in for a drain and spin to use less gas in drying. This is about 6 minutes of electricity.



Then, I dry them!

When I'm done, I drop them off on the kitchen table.



And, I repeat wetting process, or wait for my other diapers that need to be washed and throw them in together. This way, some soap comes into contact with them and can get anything off that doesn't need to be there (sizing, packaging, you never know...).



See how they are all fluffy now? This was taken after about 6 washes, I think we're good to go, but since B still fits in her infant size, I will use them and keep washing away since I have to wash any way. The darker colored diapers are Indian cotton and take more prepping, but I LOVE them. (These are also "premium" meaning that the center strip has more fabric, a 4x8x4.) The white are Chinese cotton and are most common, but, they do not sell these in premium where I purchased my dipes.



And my covers/rubber pants?

They are right here, well, a few!

The green is a FLIP- LOVE these even though they do not have leg gussets, my jelly roll holds poopies in (usually). I also have a butternut color, these both will fit her until she is about 30 pounds.
The blue is a Thirsties, pretty good, a little awkward at times as the front is more of a straight cut, I like to wrap the front around her waist towards the back for extra protection. I also have a green in the next size up.
The white is a Kissaluvs, no matter what setting, it is SO tight on her legs!
I also have a Blueberry (LOVE IT!). This will fit her until she is 30 pounds.





And, I fasten my diapers with a snappi. This is a rubbery Y shaped (with REALLY long 'V' parts and the leg is short) contraption that literally hooks (like teeth) into the diaper and holds it in place. Very easy to use once you've played a few times! Maybe I'll show you some time, but my baby is asleep. I just have never photographed her without a cover on... don't want pee all over myself.

And so, that is diaper prepping.

Cheaper than 10 washes, uses less water, and makes them just as fluffy! :)

Road Trip

I wish there were some funny stories to tell about our 8 hour, then 7 hour car ride to Shreve, Ohio and back.... but, I am so grateful that really, there aren't any.

Other than the old man/lady crabbing we did at jerky drivers, it was pretty smooth. Brooke slept almost the entire way, seriously. We stopped once, then got lost in Mansfield and had to stop again, if we hadn't gotten lost, one time would have been plenty! The babe woke up and I entertained her with a rattle, that kid LOVED it! Really, a butterfly on a rattle = pure bliss. Hilariously wonderful.

I was thinking if other people have these awful thoughts when placing their child's car seat before a long trip, or ever:

- If we get in an accident, and she dies, I hope I die too, so maybe we should be on the same side of the car.
- What would Jon do if he lost both of us? Maybe we should be on opposite sides of the car.
- What if Jon is driving, where does B go?
- What if I drive?

We got a hot van, and are still talking about how fabulous it was for us. I could climb back and forth from the front to back. It was such a smooth and comfortable ride with a lot of space.

We spent hours upon hours with Brooke's great grandma Sue and grandpa Walt on this trip, by the way, Jon put Blyn's car seat on my side, thank goodness I didn't have to make that decision. We talked about Dear John letters, great great great grandparents, pictures, sleep habits, farming, Lebron James, and babies. We even found a few cute family names along the way, Everett and Parilee, along with lots and lots of people who went by their initials.

I spend a lot of time alone, well, Brooke is on my hip, or bouncing with me, but I think a lot. I think about the blessing that family is to our family. And more than that, is I think how amazing it is who Brooke has around. Maybe it is normal, but it doesn't seem normal to me. Four great grandmas, 2 great grandpas, a great great aunt and uncle in the next town over and even more across states, great aunts and uncles all over, second cousins, some removed, etc. If this child needs a family member, she's got one almost anywhere. It is so special, such a sense of security that I hope she will grow up feeling.

She is still napping, almost 2 hours, she missed her morning nap, so figures! Last night Jon put Brooke to bed and it only took about 15 minutes until she was out- 7pm OH YEA! I fed her again at 10:30 (planned it) and she made it unitl 5:30, then we both slept until 8:45, sweet sweet girl. My little 12 week old punk, oh how I love her.

Ps- I want matching pajamas as a family this Christmas... totally dorky and awesome.

Rambling Wednesday

Today, I blogged in my head, and I was really funny.

Now, I'm just sitting here with a super cute brown haired princess strapped to my chest who refuses to lay in her own bed. Have we created a monster? It is a 99% possibility, but I'll take it! "Don't let your kids sleep in your bed! Force them to nap every day on their own. Cry it out!"

No thanks.

I help soothe B-lyn to sleep, but today when she shrieked to the point of almost passing out like her momma did as a baby, I said SCREW THIS! And snuggled my pumpkin while rubbing her little belly. I tried keeping milk out of my life, I do not know if she is sensitive to it or not, but it didn't seem to change any tummy problems. Maybe it isn't a tummy problem after all since she fell asleep on my chest in bed, and again in the Moby? I'm not sure... but that wasn't a sad cry, that's all I know, because, well... I'm her momma.

I just got my pants stuck in the computer chair, because heaven forbid Victoria's Secret make their pants for NORMAL people rather than German/Swedish/Swiss models with a 40 inch inseam... mine is 28.5, I don't think they even make jeans that short in a custom jean shop. Geesh.

I did the dishes today with B asleep, even dropped a few things that made me jump, sweet sleeping baby didn't notice one bit. Glory hallelujah!

We're leaving on Friday to visit Jon's family, don't come and rob my house, we don't have anything good. Anyway... Jon's car was hit at school by a worker, so he is getting it repaired over the long weekend- strategy here: Work will get a rental car for us, would like larger car for travel in case Nana wants to come with, lower gas mileage than our big car. Therefore.... we are SO excited to get a MINI VAN!!!!!!!

So not kidding. I am chomping at the bit to get a mini van with our next child/2 or whatever, and Jon is 100% on board. We may be the ONLY 24 and 26 year olds with this desire... and that rocks. More on the lot for us to pick from as all those old 30 somethings trade their vans in. Oh shut it, my blog, I can call you old, sisters :), the benefit to being the baby.

We really see the value and function in the size of a van. We get the whole SUV/Crossover Craze, it makes sense: spend more money, get less usable space, and look cool. Um, sign me up. NOT. I can barely climb into Jonathan's SUV without holding on to the side... put a child in my hand, we'll be diving head first. Let's not even discuss gas mileage. For our life, a van will make much sense. I am very happy to get a van one day... when we have the money.